- The super plus size woman wearing the cropped top with a navel ring.
- The young suburban white teen boys with the do-rags and crooked billed hats.
- The guy driving a monster truck stuck in the median of the Northway on a snowy day.
- All mid-50's people that dress like they're 25.
- Any adult who tries to speak street - " shizzle my nizzle ", "No you dinnit!"
- Men who not only watch but also discuss soap operas.
- Women who try to be one of the boys at a sporting event - high fives, butt slaps (o.k. we'll allow that)
I think you get the drift. These examples were about "negative ij-juts".
The poster person for all known negative ij-juts is Rosie O'Donnell. By her own admission on her website, she dropped out of college with a 1.62 cumulative average to pursue comedy. Now she has the ear of millions of t.v. viewers - why? She spews crap but people, mostly fellow ij-juts, listen.
Now "positive ij-juts" are just fun loving bozos and goofs, jerks and pranksters. I would consider myself a card carrying "positive ij-jut".
So what's the difference? We are appropriate. We knowingly ij-jut to be funny. We are blatantly idiotic and would take umbrage if not called an ij-jut. Most of us have been life long ij-juts and have honed our skills.
I've always thought that there should be a club with hats and secret handshakes. We could have chapters like the Elks, Moose and Lions. I guess our animal could be the Basset Hound or maybe a chicken. Hey! We could have Fog Horn Leghorn!
Some examples of appropriate behaviors-
- the finger pull fart
- the obligatory tap dance exit
- screaming,"Yea baby, do it to me! Yea Daddy!" over and over when you stay with your wife in a motel. Of course when there is no sex. Best done when a friend or one of her relatives is in the next room. She doesn't even have to be there.
- Chinese fire drills
- Hellen Keller jokes
- dancing like no one is watching, while bobbing your head and biting your upper lip
The poster person for appropriate ij-juts, who else David Letterman.